she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
