READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
