Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize