is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
