every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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