Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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