we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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