Are we in a gay sports bar?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
