So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Randomize
