he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
where does the pee come out of this thing
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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