I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
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i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
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i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day