Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
