Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
