This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Randomize
