if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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