brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
