Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
The struggles of a small town man whore
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
