My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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