its not stalking. its research.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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