Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize