he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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