do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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