her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
