can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
God, I missed his penis.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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