So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
