also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
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