When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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