i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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