At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize