i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
