Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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