so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
