I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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