So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
