i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
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