Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(269): View more from Michigan

Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail

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(650): View more from California

Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.

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(703): View more from Virginia

the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex

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(908): View more from New Jersey

we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours

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(713): View more from Texas

counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.

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(260): View more from Indiana

After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.

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(516): View more from New York

Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.

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