I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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