we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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