I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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