I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
