I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
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