yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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