jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I want her autograph on my taint
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
