There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
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