I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
