sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
