idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Houston, we have a blender
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
