is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I AM VODKA MAN
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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