the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
