ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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