Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
