First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
