Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
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her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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